Two weeks before my son Jimmy’s recent wedding I asked God for some very specific provision. And He gave it.
When I made my requests I was thinking back to another son’s wedding, two years prior. Actually, Nils and Brina celebrate their anniversary TODAY...as I write this post. (Congratulations!!) Theirs was a relatively small wedding. We hosted it here in our backyard, on our patio overlooking the lake. And everything about the day was picture perfect. The weather, the flowers, the gathering of friends and family, the love. A beautiful new daughter. My radiant son.
Except. Here’s the thing. A wedding is never just a day. When you have a big family, immediate and extended, and when you have people traveling from out-of-state and out-of-country…the pre- and post-nuptials can go on for days-on-end in both directions. Guests arriving for parties and showers; guests lingering for vacation at the lake. Guests filling every bunk, every bedroom, every bathroom. Mattresses tucked into extra spaces.
And all of these guests need to EAT.
Honestly it’s probably the meal-prep that puts me over the edge. I am not by nature inclined toward food-hospitality. (Full disclosure.) It’s overwhelming. The planning. The shopping. The prep and the mess. The cyclical nature. Just when you’ve finished one meal, it’s time to think about the next.
That said.
When it comes to life’s big events—weddings, reunions, Christmases, etc.—I can start getting stressed months in advance. Just thinking about it.
(I should probably also mention that being an introvert adds another layer of crazy to these stretches of non-stop parties.)
So. A couple of weeks before our most recent wedding, I asked God for some very specific provision. And He gave it.
Every.
Single.
Thing.
You do not have because you do not ask God (James 4:2). No kidding.
What I wanted more than anything was the capacity to thoroughly enjoy my people. I wanted to be present to the moments. I wanted to savor the memories. And so I asked.
And He answered. But not in the way I was expecting. Actually, His provision was MORE.
A lot more.
Back story…
In addition to acknowledging my tendency to become overwhelmed by hospitality, I had also been dealing for a while with some quirky things I’d chalked up to being “menopausal.” Without going into too much detail, my main complaint was a heightened sense of FEAR. In recent years I’ve had an annoying habit of responding in fear to situations I perceive as dangerous. Driving. Water. Ladders. Bunkbeds. And when I say annoying, I mean for me and (especially) for my people. Most specifically my husband.
So. When I came to God with my request for wedding-season provision, He surprised me with an unexpected invitation. A Spirit whisper. A gentle nudge toward a much needed surrender…
He asked me to give up my FEAR.
I should add, I was fasting. A spiritual practice I rarely embrace, and which typically (as the Bible suggests) I do in secret. But for the sake of full disclosure, and giving credit where it’s due…and for any who might benefit from the transparency of this little story…
I was praying and fasting when I asked God for His provision. And what I received was miraculously MORE.
Now. Explaining a miracle is always a bit of a mystery. Hard to explain how something you’ve carried for an annoyingly long time is just suddenly GONE and there’s no doubt it. You’re just aware in your spirit and in its place is the Spirit making every provision.
Every provision.
Two weeks of nonstop parties and God as my witness I got to enjoy
every. single. minute.
Every minute acutely aware of His peaceful presence. Every minute present to my people. Savoring and enjoying. No fear. Prayers answered and more. God, I thank you.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
Amen.
God is so so good— the Giver of all good and precious gifts! Thank you for sharing your miracle!